Practical Inspiration from Coach Darcy

How to Click Less and Connect More

The state of Georgia, here in the US where I live, recently banned texting and emailing while driving. That led a Facebook friend of mine to confess that she's created her own Pavolovian response to traffic signals, checking her Blackberry at every red light. No wonder traffic has been moving so slowly.  

Don't get me wrong--I love our technology. It's amazing that during my recent trip to Budapest, I could text my Mom in 5000 miles away--and get her response in seconds. The ability to send a client a proposal instantly over email is a far cry from the 9 p.m. FedEx runs during my early career.

 

But as I watch the behaviors of my clients and colleagues, I keep asking: Are we're using technology, or is it using us?

 

That's why my latest newsletter shares how--and why!--to click less so we can connect more. Read it here, and don't miss the extended tips on my website here.

On Deck: Your Ideal Team

In my neighborhood, the youth soccer teams are now in full force, catching World Cup fever thousands of miles away from the games. Down the street, there's a family I always spot in their Little League uniforms, usually with post-game ice cream. And at my local YMCA, the swim team screams can be heard from the parking lot!

Welcome to the time of team. We're in full summertime mode here in the US, and that means teams that play--and also that work. In fact, I've noticed a surge of newly formed teams as companies realize they still have big objectives to complete in 2010--and the year's almost half over!

The people and teams I'm coaching keep asking one thing, "Who do we need on our team to make it work?" So, with a little thought (and a little whimsy sparked by a day at the ballpark), I've created a list for you.

Read the full article here.

For a complimentary subscription to my monthly newsletter and a free copy of my special report, "The Right Words to Build Confidence," sign up here.

Why Are Women Still "Bitches"?

I'm a fan of Peggy Klaus, whose book "Brag: The Art of Tooting Your Horn Without Blowing It" contains great tips for communicating your value at work and elsewhere (you can find it in my reading list here). That's why I read Peggy's recent New York Times column with interest. Titled "Neither Men Nor Mice," Peggy shares how she's seeing women leaders increasingly becoming concerned about "being labeled 'a bitch'."

Ouch. I even saw this in my own work last week, when one of my clients, an incredibly accomplished young woman making great strides to strengthen her personal presence and confidence told me, "I am not afraid of being called a bitch." But I could tell she'd rather not be. Who wouldn't?

Why are women still "bitches?" Why should that even be a possibility today?

I wish I had an answer. When I first started working in the 80's, I might have said that it was novelty--women had just exploded in the workforce, with our floppy ties and nude stockings. In the 90's, I might have said that it was fear--that women had become more accomplished than ever, with money, strength, and power. In the 00's, I might have thought that it was concern--with an increased focus on family and home, society desperately longed for nurturing rather than one more hard-driving exec.

But now, we're in 2010. After a recession that corrected itself right out of many male-oriented jobs, more women are now in the workforce than men. Women have power, money, intelligence, and strength AND are managing loving and healthy families and communities. Even in the most male-oriented organizations, like the Catholic Church, women rule--I noticed for example that at my mom's church on Easter, 90% of the laypeople making the mass happen were female--including both altar girls.

So I'm not sure how to solve it, how to stop people--women and men!--from living in a two-standard world where a demanding guy is "leadership material" and a demanding gal is "bitchy." But I can ask the question and pay attention to it in my work. And finally, maybe I can care less about how and when the label applies to me, since when I refuse to give it any power, it fades further and further away.

What are your thoughts? Have you been called a "bitch?" Have you labeled someone else? I welcome your comments on this blog or via email at darcy@coachdarcy.com.

Turning Doctors into Leaders

Great Harvard Business Review article on how doctors need to become leaders instead of practitioners. It's leadership, not legislation, that will turn health care around :

http://hbr.org/2010/04/turning-doctors-into-leaders/ar/1#

Exploring "Corporate Resilience"

Here's a term that's landed on my desk a few times in the past week--"corporate resilience." But what is it really?

Let's break it apart. Corporate--well, we know what that is. Companies. Businesses. Organizations. The Places Stuff Gets Made or Services Get Delivered or Ideas Come to Life (at least, for most of our corporations, we hope that's the case.)

Resilience, then, is defined as "the ability to recover quickly from change, illness, or misfortune; buoyancy." It's also defined as "the property of a material that enables it to resume its original [emphasis added] shape or position after being bent, stretched, or compressed; elasticity."

Certainly there's been a lot of bending, stretching, and compression in today's corporate world. We've also had our share of change and misfortune, and even illness if you consider a gap in ethics and just plain ole common sense a type of sickness. So the need for resilience has been clear.

But do we need to re-cover, or create new "covers" altogether. Rather than bouncing back  to the original shape, might it be time to change our dimensions completely?

Is it time for corporate resilience, or corporate renovation?

A Lesson in Delayed Gratification, from a Surprise Source: Facebook

Wherefore art thou, delayed gratification? We can find any answer ASAP on Google, we can order one book from among millions of choices immediately on Amazon, and we can even get physical product in my hands pretty quickly through UPS and FedEx.  So we don't have to wait for much. 

So why is one man purposely waiting to create billions of dollars of tangible net worth, for himself but also for his employees, investors, and others?

This was the theme behind a  story in yesterday's Wall Street Journal about Facebook CEO, founder and genius Mark Zuckerberg, called "Facebook Founder in No Rush to 'Friend' Wall Street" .

In the article, Zuck (as the WSJ says he is known to most) was positioned as almost the counter-CEO. Instead of hurrying to grab profits and riches now while the iron is hot (on behalf of both stakeholders, employees, and himself), the 25-year-old Zuck has already passed over a $1 billion offer from Yahoo and an estimated $8 billion deal with Microsoft years later. While seen to be preparing for an IPO since 2008, Zuckerberg has been in no hurry to pull the trigger. 

The personal value Zuckerberg seems to be holding close here is delayed gratification, something thought lost in today's workplace. In exchange for the payday wait, Zuckerberg gets control in an ever-changing medium. He gets flexibility to do what he thinks is best. He gets the gift of creativity, so he can try new things--and fail. And, he gets the luxury of living a bigger vision, rather than watching a short-term goal.

According to the article, this delayed gratification isn't without its challenges, and the company has had to arrange innovative deals with investors for employees to see some additional cash rewards when they're not seeing IPO-level payoffs. Zuckerberg also tires of "the question" every time he speaks, now telling reporters he won't comment on it.

But pressures aside, the guy named Zuck who also happens to have created something that's changed our online and sometimes offline lives, doesn't seem to be bending to the pressure. He has a vision for the future, a clear understanding of what he has and what he needs, and seeks counsel but holds his own. For those of us who aspire to be better leaders in our businesses and our lives, there's a powerful lesson in that for all of us.

Why Can't We All Be Canadian?

I'll admit it--they've sucked me in. I'm not even a winter sports fan, but this year's Olympics have been the most engaging cold-weather competitions I can remember. Why am I intrigued enough to risk dark bags under my eyes and a grouchy disposition when I've gone to bed too late? I finally figured it out--it's the Canadians. 

I can't remember seeing so much pure joy, spirit, and fun in the eyes of the locals who are hosting the world these past two weeks. And by "locals," that also includes the Canadian citizens who live hundreds of miles away, in Toronto . .  Montreal . . . Florida. Everyone wants to flash that little maple leaf on their mittened palms. It seems that all Canada cares.

Wouldn't it be great if we could create that enthusiasm and passion in our organizations? I was talking to a corporate leader the other day who had gone through "yet another round" of conversations about how to engage up-and-coming performers in the current business challenges. But the old ways and old conversations weren't working for them. He said, "We can't seem to motivate any passion for the work anymore."

Is it passion, or is it that we all need a little dose of Canadian? Maybe we need our leaders and organizations to help us care about something bigger than profits and results, bigger than what's in it for us. Maybe we need to shift our focus away from short-term results to the to the success of others who accomplish tough things over the long haul, through hard work and dedication. Perhaps we need to create common events and causes that all of our teams and divisions can connect to and value.

Oh sure, we'll still hear chants of "USA! USA!" before the flame goes out. But when ice dancing winners Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir stood on the gold medal podium and sang "Oh, Canada!" with gusto and glee, I knew the Canadians were on to something.  Send a little down here, please (and pack a pair of maple leaf mittens in the box, too).